Monday, April 20, 2009

I'm on pause...

I've been feeling.....out of sorts? lost? I don't really know honestly. Maybe life has gotten a little too routine? Wait...I'm the one who hates change right? So that can't be right. Ugh.

I'm one of those who can't figure her own self out. I'm in a mood and I can't explain it until a few days...weeks later. Maybe I'm too emotional or maybe I'm just not in tune with my emotions at all. Whatever it is, it's frustrating.

I feel like I am just floating along, waiting for something to happen. But what? I'm not in drive, I'm not in reverse...I'm just in neutral. Well, hello, I'm here! Just waiting for the next little piece of craziness to happen to me.

Even that is odd to say...I've had several things happen to me in my life lately that should be keeping me preoccupied. Maybe I've just lost my ability to actually live in the moment...I just kind of shrug my shoulders and go along. Eick, that sound awful.

Maybe I just don't want to deal with things. Period. I feel like a lot of things that are occurring in my life are beyond my control. And I like control. I need it. I can't live without it. So lately, I've been just getting in bed, pulling the covers over my head, and letting things go.

It's getting to me. Something needs to be done...but what? That's what I need to figure out. Immediately.

I'll get back to you when I do....

8 comments :

  1. I know exactly what you mean. I'm like you, always trying to figure myself out...

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  2. It could just be hormones ...

    Good luck finding the right balance in your life!

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  3. Some times we all get in a rut. You'll come out of it. Just start making plans and set some goals that will keep you out of bed and back into life. Eventually you'll get out of the funk. Hang in there!

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  4. I know how you feel! I have gone through periods like that (I am kind of there now), normally the only thing that gets me out of that funk is to plan something... like a fun vacation, even if its just a weekend trip to the beach or camping in the mountains! I just means I can organize things and put them together and then have a fun get away, and normally when I come back I am refreshed. Hang in there!

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  5. My friend and I call that being in a funk. Funks aren't that fun. :(

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  6. Ugh. I hate that feeling.. It seems like every day, every night, every weekend, it's the same old story! Change it up a bit- make some new plans.. Even though you may not want to do anything now.. push yourself a little. It just might be the little something you need! If all else fails.. new shoes always help! :)

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  7. Totally understand how you are feeling. I have been feeling out of sorts too. Sending warm thoughts your way!

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  8. Yes, this is something I feel as though I relate to a little bit. I've been trying to figure out how to push the play button for a few months now. Stick with it! You'll figure it out.

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