Time to Pay it Forward

I've had a few things laid on my heart lately and while I haven't sorted everything out in my head just yet to be able to put all of them into words I am at least ready to talk about one of them and that is being more thankful and giving. I know I've briefly touched on this before, but I'm not the most joyful giver...of anything. I'm kind of a "I'll tend to my business and you tend to yours" type of gal. That worked for awhile and then I entered a phase of life (*ahem* motherhood) that blew my socks off and required me to ask for help.

Asking for help has never been an easy task...okay, well...it's getting easier now, but it's hard for me to not be in control of it all and equally hard for me to know that I simply can't do it all on my own. I've had some amazing people step up to the plate and help me in my times of need and I could not be more thankful. In fact, my mom is on her way to rescue me right now as I am chin deep in numerous projects that need to get done before baby Jackson arrives. Seriously...she's driving 4.5 hours to help me clean out a room. That's no fun. That's giving. 

I wish I could say I give back to those around me, but I'd be lying. It's something that I desperately need to work on and make sure I carve out time for. I tend to pack my schedule so full of projects and what not that I have a hard time seeing that there is any time left to give to anyone else. I'm pretty sure that's the definition of selfishness right there. Yep...I'm admitting it...I'm self absorbed.

I think we all go through seasons like this and for me...this has admittedly been a long one. I'm not exactly sure what the purpose of this post was except that I felt convicted to share it. My hope is to become a more joyful giver. I want to see past myself more and shift the focus to others. I believe this comes naturally to some people, but for me...not so much. Wish me luck!