Friday, September 9, 2011

A Case of the Mommy Guilt

There is something that I have been beyond anxious about and honestly have put into the back of my mind until today. 


We are leaving bright and early tomorrow morning to fly to Wyoming. My very generous dad decided to let Michael and I tag along for his dream trip to Yellowstone. I am beyond excited to go. It's on my "must visit" list. So you might be wondering why I'm anxious?











See those two precious faces above?


I have to leave them both for the whole week. 


When we planned this trip in January I had no idea how I would feel about not taking Ethan. He was 3 months old at the time and I couldn't even imagine what he would be like at this point and couldn't figure out how we could bring him along without putting major crinkles in my dad's plans.


3 Month Flashback


I still feel like it's the best decision to leave him behind. It's a long flight with a layover each way. There are two hour drives to and from the Park to where we are staying every day as well as a 5 hour trip one day to another city for the last half of our trip. We will be hiking a lot as well as doing even more driving. None of this is conducive to an 11 month old. 


Now, I'm not one of those moms who have never been away from their child. I have. Just not for more than a day at a time. And Lola, yes, I've been away from her before obviously, but this will be the first time she has to be boarded and not stay with family (Dad is our normal dog sitter). And let's just say she hasn't adjusted very well to not being an only child and I'm hoping that boarding her doesn't send her over the edge.


I feel beyond lucky to be able to go to Yellowstone and I feel like a bad person for even complaining, but at the same time, I'm really sad to leave my everyday companions. 


I am going to miss an entire week of my little boys life! 


I'll laugh at this statement one day I'm sure, but for now when we are on the cusp of his very first birthday...it seems like a really big deal. I know he will be fine. He absolutely loves staying with his Bebe and Granddaddy. In fact, I hope they will still be willing to watch him again sometime after a full week of having him as a houseguest. I am just having some serious mommy guilt at the moment. 


Lola needs a hair cut, but I didn't want to inflict anymore torture!


I plan on blogging through this trip so I won't be totally absent around these parts. I will try to keep the "missing my baby" thoughts to a minimum in my trip posts. Let's just hope that Lola and I both come back mentally and emotionally unscathed and that Bebe and Granddaddy survive the week. As for Ethan? I'm more than certain that he will be okay and won't mind a bit.





10 comments :

  1. Um, girl..you are so allowed to be worried/miss him. In less than 2 weeks, Declan and I are doing the same. While I'me excited about the trip, I'm so...just...weirded out at the thought of getting to shut my mom brain off! I honestly don't think I'll be able to.

    So you don't have to keep your missing-baby thoughts to a minimum. Share away.

    have fun!

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  2. While it's much easier said than done take this time to relax! Us Mommy's don't get to go that very often! Don't forget, you are totally entitled to miss Ethan and Lola! Share away, we are all here to help support you!!

    P.S. That 3 mo. pic is so stinkin cute!!!! It's so sad how fast they grow up!

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  3. I'm sure it's only natural to be feeling some momma guilt! But you'll both make it through the week. Just think of the excited little face you'll be greeted with when you get back from your trip :)

    Hope you have a wonderful time!

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  4. I totally understand--I get anxious leaving Donut just with her dad! It's nice that you have family close by who can help. You'll love having a bit of a break. Sometimes I wish we had family closer so that I could leave her once in a while and take some time to myself.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't blame you for being anxious at all... But I'm sure everything will be fine! :) Oh, those terriers... Our JRT hasn't been too keen about welcoming a new "sibling" either. He used to love to go to doggy daycare, though, so I'm sure being at the kennel will be a fun change for Miss Lola! :) I hope you have a great weekend!

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  6. Aw Mama it will be ok. Thank goodness for technology these days and camera phones huh.

    I hope you can put aside your anxiety to enjoy yourself.

    Think of that big grin when you get back. It will be so sweet.

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  7. After just taking a direct flight and a short drive with a 9 month old - let me just tell you, you're making the right decision! It's so good to have some alone time with the hubby and you'll be the best mommy in the world when you get back!

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  8. i am sure that what you're feeling is perfectly alright laura. a week is a big deal! lola will make it through her boarding stay just fine, don't worry. i have had to do the same for shila and although i know it wasn't ideal for her, she came home just the same the dog as when she went in to boarding. :) and as you so eloquently put it - ethan will make it through just fine. :) have fun on your trip! don't forget - you can always call home and call the boarding place to check in on your two loves.

    x

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  9. Brandon and I have had the conversation of leaving Giada for ONE day so we could go on a little weekend vacation a few hrs away, and I still can't bring myself to do it. I want to hyperventilate every single time I think about it. So it's ok to miss him. But the good thing is that you are leaving him with someone whom you completely trust, and you'll be able to do something that you've been dreaming about for a long time too :-)

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  10. Hi I'm a new follower from twitter (@4loveofcupcakes) :o)

    I totally understand- it will definitely not be easy, but I really hope you have a great time and enjoy a little bit of a break. I would miss my LO like crazy too. Have a good time!

    Jamie
    ForLoveofCupcakes.com

    ReplyDelete

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